If the thought of an office party makes you anxious, know this: you’re not alone.
Social anxiety, the fear of social situations or interacting with others, is incredibly common. As psychologist Christian Jarrett points out, it’s natural for most people to worry about things like reputation and status. And we fear looking foolish.
When preparing for a corporate event, try to view it not as a threat but as an opportunity to forge connections, bond with colleagues, and have fun. It helps to recall specific moments—no matter how rare—when past company events left a positive mark: times you had a great time or made a new friend.
One of the most effective ways to reduce social anxiety is to be proactive. If there are colleagues you’d like to go to the party with, don’t wait for them to invite you. Take the initiative and invite them first—they’ll probably appreciate it. If small talk is challenging, prepare in advance: catch up on recent events or company news.
For people who don’t socialize much, come up with a few fallback lines ahead of time to use when a conversation stalls.
If you find yourself feeling overlooked at the party, look for someone who seems even more left out. Then ask them something neutral yet relatable, like their thoughts on holiday gifts.
Even better, seek out someone who seems left out and be the person who brings a little positive energy.
No one thinks poorly of you. In fact, most people aren’t thinking about you at all.
Some psychological research might bring you comfort, notes Christian Jarrett. A team of researchers from Washington University in St. Louis found that friends of socially anxious people often view their relationships more positively than the socially anxious people do. In other words, your friends likely care about you more than you realize.
Another study found that socially anxious people mistakenly believe others are highly critical of their appearance. In reality, most people don’t pay much attention to you at all, BBC Science Focus reported.
Keep this in mind when you’re agonizing over what to wear or what to say. People are generally wrapped up in their own thoughts and don’t judge you as harshly as you might think.
Why go through all this trouble when you could just stay home? First, not every workplace will look kindly on that choice. Second, avoiding the “scary” situation only fuels the problem. Alcohol or drugs won’t solve it. Complex social fears can only be eased through practice.
